Well friends, I have sad news to report.
During this crazy journey, the chullet has put up a very brave fight.
I really thought that my weird beard would go the distance.
But, alas, ‘twas not meant to be…
The chullet has dearly departed from my face.
The last several days, I’ve been left with handfuls of soggy chullet clumps in the shower. We have found lovely little chullet droppings around the house. (I tried to blame those on the dog, but that didn’t work.)
It went from luxurious to lifeless almost overnight.
Finally, I realized the inevitable…it was time to say farewell to my hairy little friend.
I will be honest, I wept as I cut off something that has become a huge part of my identity. It was tough shaving it and seeing a strange looking dude in the mirror.
As I cried, I realized that I was actually being given an incredible gift, the gift of empathy.
Now, I know how it feels. To the countless brave fighters who have gone before me and have had to shave part of their image and identity…
I get it.
It’s crazy how a crazy beard can grow on you.
My chin hasn’t been naked since 1989…Seriously!
My daughter has NEVER seen me without some form of beard. I’m hoping that she recognizes me.
One of my biggest childhood dreams was to grow a beard.
I would sit around and draw pictures of adult me with a big nasty beard.
To me, the beard was the epitome of free spirited manliness.
It was an exclamation point for your face!
I was a late bloomer, I couldn’t grow a beard until I was 20. But, since then, I’ve experimented with every possible expression of whisker. I’ve had a full beard, a full goatee, even the modified Dutch goatee.
Several years ago, I finally decided to just let it grow wild and define itself.
My facial fuzz, I believe by divine design, evolved into the “Chullet”.
The chin mullet.
It has served as both a built in scarf and a handy to go container.
It has been both a conversation starter and a polarizing Force.
It was part of me…literally!
I shampooed, conditioned, and slathered it with fragrant beard oil every day.
It was proof that just because something looks wild doesn’t mean that it’s not clean.
Over the years, the chullet has survived the beard-bashers, the haters who yanked it and said mean things.
It survived split ends and high winds.
It survived curious, grabby children and cranky old people with scissors.(seriously…it happened! Luckily, I could outrun them.)
But this week, the powerful chemo drugs that are attacking my cancer cells also attacked my chullet cells.
It’s okay.
I can live with that.
In fact, I can live BECAUSE of that.
I will gladly sacrifice my weird little beard for the chance to see my granddaughter graduate from high school.
But, here’s the deal…
the chullet was more than a scruffy explosion of facial fuzz.
It was an attitude.
It served as a simple statement that said…
“HEY! my face is a party!”
I still have that attitude.
Now I just get to express it in different ways.
Nothing says my face is a party like a big goofy smile.
The belly bully will NOT steal my ability to smile.
In fact, now I see smiling as an act of defiance.
AND SO I SMILE!
I have also been sent a lot of great beard solutions from friends…fake facial hair, face paint.
I’m going to have some fun with those, I’m thinking that right now, my big, wide open face cries out for a glittery unicorn.
that’s a party!
And as I continue to party with my face.
I wait…
because…
I know that IT is coming…
SON of CHULLET!!
carbonated joy 
Man, that can be really depressing. But I know that you knew the inevitable would happen as in most cases with the ugly life saving poison. As you have mentioned, there has been a multitude of alternatives suggested. Here is one, I have very long hair, to the middle of my back and only short chin hair, I had it as long as yours at one time but figured only one side of my head needed to be long and the top and back won. Here it is, I would be willing to shear off some of the back, as long as your chullet was, have it fashioned into a chullet toupee so to speak so you would not scare anyone who has known you for as long as you have worn you defining facial hair. You would have to have it colored to your natural color as at age 67 I still do not have grey hair, it is a dirty blond. Or you could leave it and add some youth to your face.. Anyway, that is my offer… By the way, we do not know each other very well even though I went to GCF until I moved but you know my daughter and son-in-law, the Gullicks.. Blessing to you my brother in Christ.
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Don, hey my brother, thank you for the offer! That’s very cool, but, I’m okay being beardless for a while. I’m going to make the most of it and have some fun. I’ve always thought you have awesome hair and I don’t want to mess that up!!
Have a great day my friend!
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