The Inevitable Prognosis.

Posted: October 12, 2017 in Uncategorized

I’m not gonna lie…
It’s been a painful summer.
My arms have hurt real bad.
They have stung and tingled and ached.
It’s been kind of like getting a tattoo nonstop for 4 months straight without any cool new ink to show for it.
At times it has felt like an angry professional wrestler was standing on my arms.
I was concerned.
I’ve tried to get answers .
I wanted to think it might be an old football injury. But that’s unlikely since I didn’t play football, I DID fall out of my recliner once while watching a game.
I talked to friends, I checked out webMD.
I took aspirin and bubble baths (yeah! I said it, I’m a man who loves a good bubble bath!)
I went to a really cool chiropractor who used some blades that looked like samurai ginseng knives to knead my muscles. He used a power tool that looked like a sander to polish my unchiseled girth. After 3 visits my back and neck felt AWESOME, but sadly my arms still hurt real bad.
So, we took X-rays.
The X-ray confirmed that I AM a short man, this was news that I had been waiting on for years.
They also confirmed that something sketchy was happening with my neck.
A really good friend, Donna, recommended an amazing nerve specialist.
I went to talk to the very nice specialist and we talked about neurology and discs and things I had always taken for granted.
I went in for a MRI.
It was in a tractor trailer in a hospital parking lot. I was led into a well lit room. I laid down and the technician strapped my head down. I suddenly felt like a science experiment. I was moved headfirst into a tight magnetic tube. The MRI was kind of like spending 20 minutes in a really loud soda can.
Then I got to take some nerve tests. My wife went back with me for this, because, frankly, she makes me brave. During that party the good Doctor poked some needles into my arms and shocked me with something that looked like a fun sized tazer. (I wanted to shout “Don’t take me bro!”) I remember my arm twitching like a drunken hand puppet.
So after the tests and about 2 weeks, I was given the results. I have Arthritis in my neck which has caused narrowing of the spine. I have no nerve or spine damage.
But, I do have Carpal Tunnel Syndrome (which sounds like the title of a cool SCI FI movie, but. It’s is NOT). Evidently THAT has been the source of my pain all along. I get to wear some arm splints that make me feel like a stormtrooper…I like that.
So the inevitable painful prognosis is…
I am getting old.
It happens to all of us, unless it doesn’t and that’s a much sadder prognosis.
Getting old(er) is NOT for sissies!!
And an additional painful kick to the arm, the medical bills are now rolling in! They are like unwanted love letters from our healthcare system. I have an unbelievably high deductible so we get to pay for all the fun. There are many things I would rather spend money on, like grouting.
It would be easy to get grumpy.
But, that has never really been my style.
Besides, along with the pain has come a little wisdom, that is what is supposed to happen as you get old.
Here’s what I’ve learned…
Gratitude is a great pain reliever.
My arms hurt, BUT…
I have so much to be grateful for!
Family, friends, a good dog, tacos.
When I focus on those things, the good and right outweighs the pain.
Gratitude is a pain reliever.
It’s been a painful summer, but it’s also been the most wonderful summer ever. I’ve gotten to play with my sweet little granddaughter.
I hold her in my sore arms and my heart fills with thankfulness and everything is better.
I want to live a life marked by gratitude, not pain.


  1. Donna Youngblood says:

    I’m so honored to be mentioned in this Carbonated Joy post. I get to use those cool arm splints at night, too!


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