Childhood can be a dangerous endeavor.

It’s a jungle out there!

I think That’s especially true if you grew up in the seventies or eighties.

It was a reckless time.

Playgrounds were scary places.

there were the steel monkey bars that were always a challenge to us short kids, but at least if we fell, the concrete would break our fall (and possibly our collarbone).

There were wobbly, brightly colored merry go rounds that could shoot an average sized kid 75 yards.

Don’t forget the tall rusty metal slides that would give you tetanus AND drop you off in a mosquito laden mud puddle.

Good times.

We stayed outside all day long…usually barefoot…WITHOUT cell phones…GASP!

We ate dirt and bugs and pop rocks.

We could do amazing feats of play with just a stick.

We never wore seat belts or car seats, the only restraining safety device we had was mom’s arm .

We rode our bikes over homemade ramps without ever even thinking about wearing a helmet. We did wheelies and rode around any patch of mud we could find.

because we lived out in the country, my  brother and I would burn the trash in our backyard. We would throw in cans of aqua net. It was a loud, beautiful explosion.

We ate paste and occasionally ran with scissors.

We chased each other with Roman candles and pop bottle rockets.

We rode everywhere in the back of a truck. We once rode all the way from Longview, Texas to Tulsa, Oklahoma in the back of an old Chevy truck. It was 285 miles. It was in the fall and it was freezing!

We…never…once…used hand sanitizers…yup, it was crazy man!

Childhood can be a dangerous endeavor.

It’s a wonder we survived.

It’s a true testament to the resilience of the human person.

I start feeling like I really accomplished something…

Until I talk to someone a little older than me.

Every previous generation had it worse.

we are the generation that survived…so are they!

The previous generation thought we were a bunch of babies.

We accuse the next generation of being entitled.

Every future generation has it a little better.

I think that’s supposed to happen.

We ARE getting softer.

BUT, that doesn’t mean we have to get safer!

As kids the reason that we almost died is because we really lived!

To live is to risk.

You can try to live without danger or discomfort.

Wrap yourself in bubble wrap, avoid spicy food and stay inside your bedroom.

But that’s not really living. It’s merely surviving…BIG difference!

Stay or play?

as a kid I chose play, I still do.

Every generation needs to find new ways to really live.

Laugh…learn…LIVE!!!

Talk to strangers.

Love, even when you know it’s gonna hurt you.

Pop some wheelies.

Have the kind of adventures that take your breath away and bring life to your soul.

The gift of life, when properly handled, can be a dangerous endeavor.

Live it!!

 

As I write this our amazing daughter, Delanie, is about two months away from getting married.
So many thoughts and emotions are flooding my mind and my heart.
I’m feeling a little sentimental.
The spunky five year old who went on daily slurpee dates with me has grown up.
Through the last 21 years, I’ve tried to teach her a few things about life and love.
And now as she leaves our home to make her own home with a super cool bass player, I find myself full of needless, last minute, frantic fatherly advice…
Advice about parenting and parking, jobs and jazz, money and Mexican food.
fortunately for Del, I’ve been able to keep most of my advice to myself.
BUT…I do have some words of grizzled wisdom for Delanie and Jordan and…well…every other human being.
I can condense my relationship advice into two words…
Love covers.
Yup…pretty simple…
Love covers.
Love doesn’t compare.
It doesn’t cut.
Love says I’ve got you and you’re safe.
Love says you can be safe in the knowing that no one will ever hear me criticize you.
We all need to know that there is always at least one other person on this cruel planet who will ALWAYS have our back.
Love covers.
Love creates a safe place for you to be the best flavor of you.
Love creates breathing room to be human.
Love covers.
Love says I’m your biggest fan, you are pretty much my favorite.
Anything that makes you feel like “less than” is not love.
Love covers.
Love says we won’t always agree, we will bug each other. Nobody else has to know that. It’s really none of their business.
Love burns away blame.
Love isn’t license.
It doesn’t cover up.
Love doesn’t ignore or excuse.
None of us get love right all the time.
But we realize the weight of our words and we do our best.
Love covers.
Love promotes.
Love never throws someone under the bus.
It buys you a bus ticket and helps you get home.
Nobody’s perfect, love protects the imperfections
Love keeps no record of wrong. It doesn’t keep score.
1 Peter 4:8 says “continue to show deep love for each other, for love covers a multitude of sins.”
Love covers.
Love believes.
I think this single practice is more valuable than a big bank account.
You can’t put a price tag on honor.
It is true security.
You will constantly have opportunities to damage the hearts that you hold most dear.
When you live up close to someone it’s easy to take cheap shots.
DON’T DO IT.
Don’t take the easy path.
Protect the hearts that have been given to you.
LOVE COVERS.

“The church sent them on their way. They passed through Phoenicia and Samaria, stopping to report to the groups of believers there that outsiders were now being converted. This brought great joy to them all.” Acts 15:3

I was struck by the beauty of this verse this morning.
The beauty of belonging.
Outsiders are coming into the family and the family is really happy about it!
That’s the way it should be. It should be a source of uncontainable joy when outsiders become a part of our party.
It makes me think of a conversation I had with my friend Mike this week. He told me about a quote that he heard…

Church should be like thanksgiving day.

Think about it…
There’s nothing like a big thanksgiving celebration.

FOOD…FAMILY…FUN!

The smells…the sounds…the stories.

There’s always that crazy uncle who will, inevitably, say or do something embarrassing.
Doesn’t matter, He still has a place at the table.
There are family members who end up napping in the corner.
There is a cousin who only eats pie.
There is life and laughter.
The more I think about it, the more I realize that Mike is onto something.
Church should feel, taste and smell like thanksgiving!
We should share food and drink.
Jesus threw parties where the food never ran out…I like that.
We should share stories.
We should laugh loud and love louder.
Church should smell like home.
There is freedom to be the weird Uncle or to take a nap or to eat a third piece of pie.
We should always be ready to add another leaf to the table.
Everybody has a place.
We ALL get to sit at the kid’s table.
We realize that is the funnest place to sit.
You don’t have to worry about appropriate.
You can burp and your cousins giggle.
You don’t have to worry about which fork to use.
You can turn your fancy napkin into a party hat.
Another crazy thing about thanksgiving…
It’s all about thanks!
There shouldn’t be any chest thumping or finger pointing.
Just hands open in gentle gratitude.
The posture of “whew!! WE made it! Pass the green bean casserole!”
We celebrate the beautiful, diverse belonging that we find at the table.
Our differences make us all the same.
Let’s serve up grace like gravy.
Let’s make a place for the outsiders and insiders…
The crazy uncles and hyperactive cousins…
We are family…
A big, crazy, messed up family.
Let’s party.

road rave!

Posted: February 24, 2015 in brain belches
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instead of road rage, I often get road rave.

Yup, I drive and dance.

I crank up the music and start moving every available body part.

It’s not necessarily pretty.

There’s a lot of head bobbing and fist pumping.

It’s really more of a spastic jerking than actual rhythmic movement.

I hoist my chunky little girth around my front seat.

It’s pretty fun.

And that is what it is all about…fun…joy.

Honestly, I don’t really enjoy driving. I’m not super good at it either.

It is boring.

So to entertain myself, I really don’t care what anybody else thinks.

I create a dashboard disco.

I sing at the top of my lungs and still manage to use my turn signals.

I get interesting reactions from other drivers.

Some point and laugh.

Some look pretty concerned.

Some look a little disgusted.

Some judge. One lady once held up a sign that just said “4”.

Some join in and start dancing too.

It’s always easier to judge than join.

But, those that do join in realize that the dance makes the drive much more fun!

Life can get ordinary.

We take the same route every day.

We need to find a way to turn the mundane into magic.

Drive and dance!

It’s all about the road rave.

It’s a lot less stressful than road rage.

Crank it up.

SNOW DAY!!

Posted: February 17, 2015 in brain belches
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SNOW DAY…those are two very polarizing words! ( get it…polar?!).

You probably either love or hate snow days.
It’s either magical or messy, usually depending on your age.
For a kid there are few things greater than a snow day.
We would get up early, just to see if we could sleep in late.
Was school closed?
You impatiently watched the names scroll across the bottom of the TV screen.
THEN…FINALLY…THERE IT WAS!!
Your reprieve from the classroom.
WOOOO HOOOO!!!
It was time to play!!!
You would get bundled up…
It was a strenuous process.
Long johns…two pairs of pants…t shirt…sweat shirt…old coat…stocking hat…gloves…boots.
Then you would stumble, barely able to move your arms, into the frozen tundra of your front yard.
Where, you would suddenly realize that you REALLY need to pee.
OH MAN!
Finally, You would play for hours until you couldn’t feel your cheeks.
then you went inside and get some tomato soup.
You could feel the healing power of the soup as it slowly made your insides warm again.
There is something undeniably special about a snow day.
Snow days have a way of freezing moments in time.
They have a way of making memories that warm your soul.
As I write this on a snow day, one other snow day in particular stands out.
It was a bitterly cold Oklahoma day.
We were hanging out at our Grandma’s house with a slew of cold, bored cousins.
My Uncle Lee had a jeep.
Guys with jeeps love snow days.
Growing up, My Uncle Lee was the single coolest human being I knew.
He was my hero.
He had long hair. He seldom wore shoes (even on snow days).
He lived wild and free.
He was a peacemaker.
He was kind to little kids and animals.
It seemed like He always had had time for us…sometimes adults didn’t.
It’s amazing how the simple act of finding time for kids can make you a rock star in their eyes.
Uncle Lee had a great snow day idea.
He got a chain and a huge piece of black rubber.
Do you see where this is going?
Where normal men see a worthless scrap of tire rubber…
Super cool Uncles see sleds!
He attached the “sled” to the jeep with the rusty chain.
We found a huge, reasonably hazard free field.
Uncle Lee did donuts and we hung on,for dear life, to the homemade sled.
Cousins were flying everywhere as he would take corners.
We laughed hard and tried to hang on.
It seemed like a great idea…
getting dragged behind a jeep and flung into rocks and trees.
Until, our pants filled up with snow.
We were frozen to the bone…so cold!
Even the chilliest memories can warm your heart.
I will never forget that snow day.
Snow days have a way of freezing moments in time.
I will never forget that moment.

My Uncle Lee left this world way too early.

He was only 41, he was building his dream house.
In a freak accident he fell backwards and hit his head.
I didn’t understand why that happened…I still don’t.
He was a great man, the epitome of gentle strength.
He was a great husband, father and brother.
He was a really cool uncle.
Cool Uncles make great Grandpas, he never got the chance.
Sometimes real life is bitterly cold.
We are left chilled to the bone.

But because, Snow days have a way of freezing moments in time.
I remember a forever young, cool Uncle and a jeep.
I remember the wild and free moments.
I remember the grown up who took the time to play.
I remember.

Memories can be like tomato soup, they warm your insides.

BEloved!!

Posted: February 13, 2015 in fizzy faith
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Remember valentines day in elementary school?

You would carefully craft a beautiful box with paper hearts & glitter.
You would proudly put it out on your desk, hoping that it would fill up with cards that reassured that someone actually likes you.
A little paper affirmation, hopefully with a heart shaped sucker attached.
We all want to be loved.
Then in middle school, maybe you watched everybody else get cheap student council carnations.
They would deliver the color coded fundraiser flowers to home room.
Everybody got to see who was loved, liked or left out.
There was always that one super popular person who got 20 carnations, while your desk sat empty.You tried to act like it wasn’t bothering you, but inside a part of you was dying.
We all want to be loved.
We grow up and realize that sometimes love stinks (thank you J. Geils).
We have all felt alone…we just want someone to say be mine.
Sometimes our paper hearts get stomped on, sometimes it seems like we are alone and Valentines Day comes along and rubs our “aloneness” in our face.
The crazy thing is that the deepest desires of ours can’t be met by another person, by an imperfect love…we need a love extravagant.
At the risk of sounding hallmarky, the One who created your heart longs to hold your heart.

He calls you beloved.

He loves you with a love extravagant…
A crazy little thing called love.
I found that love…
I know that love…
I have been wooed by an uncontainable and unexplainable love…a love that accepts and arrests me…a love that gives…a love that constantly whispers “Be Mine” to my insecure soul. A love that finally equips me to love others.
We all want to be loved.
It all boils down to that simple invitation to be known, to be His, to be loved.
Listen deep….

Father says to you…

be mine! Be loved! I AM with you! You aren’t alone…you were NEVER alone!

The One who created you, who has memorized everything about you, calls you beloved. You are greatly loved with a love extravagant.
Be His!!
Be LOVED!!

“Consider the kind of extravagant love the Father has lavished on us—He calls us children of God! It’s true; we are His beloved children.” – 1 John 3:1

labels…

Posted: February 10, 2015 in fizzy faith
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I’ve been called a lot of things, but here is what I’ve come to realize…

Labels have to be believed to be seen.

People can call you anything and they will!

It’s like they put nasty little post it notes on your heart.

You don’t have to let it stick.

Their labels don’t have to become your limitations.

Labels have to be believed to be seen.

If you refuse to believe it, the labels don’t stick to your soul.

I refuse to believe the limiting labels.

Here are the labels that I choose to believe…

“The one who formed you says do not be afraid, for I have ransomed you. I have called you by name; you are mine.” Isaiah 43:1

So people can call me what they want, I don’t have to listen.

I know the truth about me.

the truth is that I’m…

Spirit formed…

Ransomed…

Called by NAME…

I AM HIS.

THESE are the labels that I choose to let stick to my soul.

Labels have to be believed to be seen.

labels can limit, they can also liberate.

freedom begins when I believe the truth.

the truth about who HE is…the truth about who I am.

I choose to believe what the ONE who formed me says.

 

poetry SLAMMED.

Posted: February 10, 2015 in brain belches
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I hate beige!

It’s the color of cubicles designed to confine.

It’s conformity, giving up, and standing in line.

 Man, I hate beige!

It’s the color of the flavorless horde

Who live their lives perpetually bored.

 Boy, do I hate beige!

It’s the color of Monday, sad songs, and tasteless food.

Also the shade of blah, apathy, and a foul mood.

 I really, really hate beige.

It’s bland, inoffensive, and politically correct.

It’s the pale hue of mediocrity, I suspect.

 I hate beige!

A few years ago, when we lived in Dallas, I almost became an NBA dancer.

I know that, if you know me,  you are probably thinking NO WAY!

some of you might have thrown up in your mouth a little.

BUT…oh, it’s true!

I was a HUGE Mavericks fan, and I saw in the newspaper that the Mavs were having tryouts for Maniaacs.
The Mavs Maniaacs are a hip hop dance troupe of beefy, uninhibited men.
They were the original NBA big man dance team.
They dance at halftime and during breaks.
The tryouts were being held at a local dance studio. There were about 100 big, sweaty, over enthusiastic dancing men. It was a sight to behold and a fragrance to be smelled. The judges were Mavs dancers and local dignitaries. I was dressed for battle: a bright orange Mavericks shirt, blue basketball shorts and Chuck Taylor all stars.
I’m a condensed beefy boy, I was about a foot shorter that the other guys. In fact, I Heard one of the judges say “look, is that mini-me?” This didn’t discourage me.
This was my shot, I was gonna take it.
They taught us a choreographed combo that we did in groups and then we got to freestyle some serious dancing.
They would eliminate several people after each round. You would wait for your number to be called (or not) and you would proceed (or not).
Again and again I danced my guts out and made it through.
This was my shot, I was gonna take it.
We ended up doing the routine about 8 times. I hadn’t danced like this since…never. My muscles were rebelling against me.
I’m allergic to choreography. I’m not coordinated enough to keep up, but I can creatively shake my booty.
This was my chance…my ONLY chance to be a part of an NBA team.
Sometimes life gives you a free throw and you got to take a shot.
Whether you make it or not, you take pride in the fact that you tried.
I made it to the final ten!!! Then they told us that they were looking for five dancers.
One more round…
Ignore the pain…
Take your shot.
During the last round , one of the judges shouted words that I thought I would never hear: “Okay, we want to see some flesh…if you want to be a Maniaac, we need to see your stomach!”
This caused most of the guys next to me to start ripping off their damp shirts and flinging them around slinging warm sweat everywhere. I learned the true meaning of GUTS and glory.
Some things should never be seen…
Some things can never be unseen.
I. Just. Could. Not.
As much as I wanted to be a Maniaac, I wanted to hold onto some shred of dignity.
I couldn’t bring myself to unfurl my man boobs.
I didn’t make the top five.
I was ALMOST an NBA dancer.
I left with my dignity, a really sore back and a great story.
I had Stepped out and lived a great story.
Life is about stepping out even when you don’t make the cut.
It’s taking risks, it’s overcoming the paralyzing fear of public opinion.

What if success were all about risking instead of reaping.
What if we realized that it’s better to be an “almost was” than a “never tried”.
What if success were found in the act of stepping out.

Sometimes you got to do something unexpected…unlikely…unbelievable.
We should live in constant pursuit of a better story.
Sometimes life gives you a free throw and you have to take a shot.
Sometimes it goes in the basket…nothing but air.
Sometimes it bounces off the backboard.
Sometimes you don’t even get close.
The point is that you took a shot…you played…you tried…you danced.
You got off your butt, you took a risk, you overcame fear.
And you gained something more valuable than any trophy…
A Life lived in pursuit of a better story.
Step up…
Take a shot…
But please, for the love of God, leave your shirt on.

BEHOLD the BEARD!

Posted: January 26, 2015 in brain belches
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Growing up I had many interchangeable dreams that came and went.

One dream came and stayed.
It was a simple dream.
I wanted a beard.
As a kid, I would literally sit around and visualize myself with a big nasty beard.
See the beard…be the beard.
I drew pictures of what I thought the bearded me would look like. It was a little creepy.
I wanted a beard.
To me, the beard was the epitome of free spirited manliness.
It was an exclamation point for your face!
My Uncle Bill, who was one of my heroes, had a beard.
Barry Gibb, Gandalf, Mr. T and Grizzly Adams…ALL had beards.
I was a late bloomer, I was almost 20 before I sprouted facial fuzz.
I tried everything to set off the stubble. I shaved my naked cheeks twice a day ( somebody told me that would work). I rubbed miracle-gro on my face. I prayed. I watched Chuck Norris movies.
FINALLY, my wildest, wooliest dreams came true.
In the last 30 years, I’ve only been without facial hair once for one misguided week in the late eighties.
I realized that my beard is the only thing that keeps me from looking like a chubby 9 year old boy. Many people have skittishly asked me, “is your Wife okay with you having that thing?” The answer is yes. For starters, she doesn’t want people to think she is married to a chubby 9 year old. She also recognizes that I’m a man who makes manly decisions about my manly face. Before you grow stubble, you probably ought to grow a spine. There are a lot of beard bashers who can’t wait to tell you what they think about your face. Chalk it up to beard envy. Haters gonna hate, don’t shave it off.
I think we are living during a magical time for beards.
It is a big hairy renaissance.
there have been epic beards in the past. Abraham Lincoln, I’m looking at you.
But I truly believe, with all my face, that we are living in the golden age of facial hair.
I’ve experimented with every possible expression of whisker. I’ve had a full beard, a goatee, a mustache, even the modified Australian Fu-Manchu.
I finally decided to just let it grow wild and define itself. It has, I believe by divine design, evolved into a “Chullet”. It is a “chin mullet”. The message is clear: It’s a party for my face.
It is a “yeard” (a beard that has grown for more than a year).
It’s a very handy thing, to be able to grow your own scarf or to go container.
How could it be a negative thing to get occasionally mistaken for Santa Claus?
A beard turns an ordinary face into art. In life, beauty is brought forth in the strangest ways. Look out for it.
A beard should be grown all year, manliness is not seasonal.
Sometimes the greatest things in life just grow on you. You do need to groom the growth to get the maximum awesomeness. That’s true with beards, it’s also true with relationships.
Sometimes your beard gets itchy. This is when many well intentioned guys give up. Don’t do it, be a man! don’t surrender the stubble. Work through the itch. It won’t last forever. Real life is the same way. life is itchy. Work through the itch. It will be worth it.
Just because something is untamed, doesn’t mean that it’s not clean. That’s true of beards, it’s also true of people. Don’t judge people.
Remember, with great beard comes great responsibility.
Unfurl your fuzz.
Celebrate your chin fruit.
BEARD up!
Let little bits of awesome escape out of your face.
VIVA LA BEARD!