carbonated joy

Diana and I got woke up by our beagle this morning at 1:30 am. She was barking and running around in circles.
Someone was knocking on our front door, we thought that’s funny, we aren’t expecting anyone.
We stumbled around in the dark, found our way downstairs, and discovered there was a police officer at our door. Maybe, it’s because I’m old, but he looked like a 17 year old Eagle Scout. He was a very nice man. It has to be scary knocking on doors in the middle of the night, not knowing what you are about to find! Our neighbor had called 911, (She had called us several times and left a message, but we had slept right through it.) she had heard a noise, looked outside and saw a man going through Diana’s car. The bad guy was on his belly in the front seat, ruffling through the car, looking for something valuable. Luckily, we didn’t have anything, so he ended up tearing out the change holder. It probably had about $1.37 in it. Good luck with that, criminal!
I’m sure that he left wearing 12 pounds of dog hair, because the car is covered with it! That could go on the all points bulletin: “the suspect is coated in hound hair”.
So, we found ourselves standing outside talking to the police when we should have been sleeping! It’s an unsettling thing when a stranger messes with your stuff! You get angry and scared. I felt really vulnerable, MAYBE, because I was standing outside in the old gym shorts that I sleep in, MORE LIKELY, it was because we had been caught in an unguarded moment.
We are usually sticklers for locking things up. We have lived in neighborhoods that required a lockdown. We even have friends who make fun of us for locking everything. BUT, the ONE time we didn’t lock, somebody got into our car.
We left it unguarded and it caused problems.
That reminds me of a verse in the Bible.
Proverbs 4:23 gives us some really good advice: “Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life.”
When this scripture says “heart”, It’s not talking about a muscular blood pumping organ in your chest.
It’s also not talking about an super amazing 70s rock band made up of two sisters.
It’s talking about your mind, emotions and will, how you think, feel and choose. These are some of the major things that make you YOU. Those things can get violated and vandalized if you don’t guard them.
How do we guard our heart? Here are my twisted thoughts…
Live in the light. Sketchy things happen in the dark, come into the light. Live open and honest so that there are no secrets or surprises. Then, there’s nothing to steal.
Hold tightly to the keys of your heart. That doesn’t mean that you lock EVERYone out, it just means that you don’t let EVERYone in. You are priceless! Don’t cheapen yourself. You are a completely unique jewel, don’t let anyone treat you like a cheap trinket. Don’t play with your heart, AND don’t let anyone else play with your heart
ALSO, You can get by with a little help from your friends. It’s good to have neighbors who watch out for you. Know who your REAL friends are and realize that sometimes they see things you don’t, so listen to them.
Guard your heart.
You will sleep better!!

I think “root” might be one of my favorite words.
It can mean to cheer for someone (or something). It’s giving moral support. It’s clapping and cheering.
It makes me think of the foamy sweetness of root beer, that makes me happy (and thirsty).
A root is the cause or source of something (or someone).
A root is the most important part of a tree, even though you can’t see it. It anchors the tree. It nourishes the tree.
We have roots.
Roots connect us to our history, they ground us.
Sometimes roots aren’t pretty, they can be twisted and gnarly.
But their power is not in the look, but in the life.
Roots are designed to give life. They are constructed to craft. They are meant to form and feed.
There is a deep sadness in a withered root.
The sad fact is that roots can get clogged or chopped. They can be unhealthy. They can recreate that unhealth in what they form and feed. But, that’s not what they are designed to do. Sometimes we need to graft new redeeming health into old roots. Sometimes we need to remember what roots are for.
Roots are meant to refresh and remind.
They are meant to go deep and anchor.
When roots are strong, thick, they give us life. They keep us from breaking in the storm.
I think “root” might be one of my favorite words.
I’m going to grab a root beer, and sit and think about it for a while.

Go out…
Make some mistakes,
Cause some double takes.
Separate the real from the fakes.
See what a difference being yourself makes.

Today,
I’m gonna keep looking up.
I have the hunch that something is about to fall out of heaven.
I want to catch it.
I have a strong suspicion that I’m about to be Spirit stunned.
That’s a real good thing.
So, I’m looking up.

A few weeks ago, our daughter, Delanie, and her husband, Jordan, stopped by to see Diana and me.
They had an announcement to make…
A BIG announcement.
A REALLY BIG announcement.
The kind of announcement that changes EVERYthing!
Our baby is going to have a baby!!
The sweet child of mine is gonna have a sweet child of her own!!
That means…
WE ARE GOING TO BE GRANDS!!!!

They told us and the floodgates opened and liquid joy leaked out of my face, it often does.

After wiping my eyes, I saw a look in my Daughter and Son-in-law’s eyes.
I recognized the look.
It was the wild eyed combo of panic, joy and more panic.
“OOOHHHMYGOSH!! IS THIS REALLY HAPPENING!?? We…don’t…know…if…We are REALLY ready for this!”
I understand that look.
We had it 23 years ago and We’ve had it a lot since then. It’s the look that most parents have for at least 18 to 20 years.
It’s the look that says I’m not sure I can do this and it scares the crap out of me.
Most really good things start out completely impossible and totally terrifying.
Life happens when you least expect it, and almost never when you are ready for it.
They will do fine.
It won’t be easy.
Impossible, terrifying things are never easy, but they are worth it.

As I’ve thought about this…
The floodgates opened and memories leaked out of my heart, they often do.

I thought back to when WE were NOT ready to have a kid and it didn’t really matter if we were ready or not, BECAUSE, it WAS happening.
We had a baby, we managed to raise her without screwing up TOO bad.
And now, she is all growed up!
And now, she is AWEsome.
AND, now she is having a baby!!!
it IS happening!

I remember…
I remember Diana craving tomato sauce and Mexican food. I gladly accompanied her to Casa Bonita. I took a tamale for the team.
I remember being insecure, scared and clueless.
But, in one moment, those feelings got muted by an instant love that was brand new to me. Love is usually a process of getting to know someone and a series of choices that you make to get to know them better. THE minute I saw my kid, it was over, I was instantly in love with her. My sister, Hope, was with us in the delivery room, taking care of business like always.

I remember our friend, Debbie, patiently coaching me through changing my first diaper. It looked like crude oil.

We couldn’t afford a baby, we had about 17 bucks in the bank.
But, God provided in incredibly creative ways.
He still does.
Family and friends gave us baby stuff and lots of advice. Our Aunt Diane bought 6 months worth of diapers! That was an incredible bottom blessing! (See what I did there?)
We didn’t know what we were doing, we called my parents every half hour…”IS THIS NORMAL?”
A few times, I’m pretty sure they broke land speed records getting over to our little house to help us more than they knew. It’s amazing that it’s only when you realize that you are helpless that you realize how much help you have.
Speaking of our little house, I remember discovering black mold in the little parsonage where we lived when we got home with our new baby…that was SCARY!
I remember being scared a lot. We were just sure that we were going to break her. Somehow, we got her through infancy.
I guess we did fine. The proof is that now, we get to be grands.
I’ve learned that kids are impossible and terrifying and tough and awesome and more fun that I can imagine.
And now, I can not wait to play with MY grandkid!!
I’m ready to teach him or her the fine art of mischief. We are gonna get into some serious trouble together. We will make some memories and live some stories.
I can’t wait to embark on this grand adventure with my best friend and our grand friends, Phil and Tabetha Daughtery.
We are going to have a seriously grand ole time!

Side note: I’ve learned that you need to pick out a “grandparent name”, nobody is JUST Grandma or Grandpa anymore. You can be Nanny, Poppy, MeMaw, Paw Paw, Me Me, Pee Pee, G-Ma or some easy to say variation. You could wait for your grandchild to give you a name, but that would take a while and you would probably end up being called “DOG” or “NO”.
I’ve decided I want my “grandpa name” to be Big Papi. I like the sound of that, it makes me sound like a Hispanic man with connections to the underworld.

I want to be a player.

People look at me funny when I say that.
I think It’s because the word Player now has negative connotations. It’s now used to describe a sketchy dude who uses and manipulates women. Let me be clear, THAT is NOT who I want to be.

I just want to play.
I want to let my imagination run loose and find new ways to amuse and amaze.

But, the word play has negative connotations, it’s silly and childlike and completely impractical. We are expected to grow out of play, we are told we need to be practical and responsible. We need to leave the childlike stuff in the sandbox, right?
Play has become the opposite of work. Players are obvious slackers, right?
But, hold on, wait a minute, can’t we work at play?

I just want to play.
But, play is not priority.
We even make it hard for people who are paid to play.
I’ve watched a few football games lately where PLAYers were penalized for unsportsmanlike behavior because of “excessive celebration” and “coordinated choreography”?!? Really?? When did playing with excitement become illegal?
People, Playing is not a crime.
You can still play in the USA.
Play is an attitude, it’s a way to take life with a grain of salt. It is mischief, it is mirth.
Many seem to think that fun makes you a flyweight. But, I think there is a profundity that is ONLY found in fun!
Play matters!
I believe that we are wired to wiggle, we are programmed to play. It has to do with how we were constructed. We came from the dirt, Maybe that’s why we feel at home on the playground. I believe in a God who is playful, He designed our bodies to make some pretty crazy noises and smells. He invented the platypus. Part of the original design was regular play dates in paradise with Adam and Eve. I think that is STILL His desire…play dates with His kids. I like that!!
So C’mon…Let’s play!