Fruity Pebbles and Ice Chips.

Posted: January 29, 2019 in Postcards from Cancerland.


I woke up craving Fruity Pebbles this morning.

It wasn’t going to happen.
I also woke up with a NG tube plugged into my nose. It makes me look like a squimish Pinocchio. It is pumping unbelievable vile bile out of my stomach.
I can’t eat anything until we get the gunk out.
So I’m enjoying some savory ice chips.

We met with our surgeon before dawn this morning and he made the call to get me a Picc line so I get some nutrition.  The team was amazing, it was like a pit crew. They busted into my room, put a blankie over my face, and within minutes inserted a tube from my elbow to my neck.
So I have a bonus port that gives me food and meds.
We took a class with an awesome lady who taught us about my other new accessory, a colostomy. I basically have an extra butt, which would have made twelve year old me crack up.
I’m becoming more and more bionic!
We have had awesome visitors and friends checking in.
We have friends that are family.
We have family that are friends.
One big adventure we had today happened early when we wanted to walk. We had to get the NG tube unplugged from the vacuum. We asked our CNA to help us. She didn’t let us know that she had never done it. She ended up spilling some of the nose nastiness on me.
That wasn’t super sweet.
It smelled like prehistoric swamp gas and bad tuna.
We did get to take a couple walks, I didn’t set any land speed records, but I didn’t fall down.
As someone who hasn’t been able to eat or drink anything for days, I realize how much I take those things for granted! I’m so used to just being able to grab a burrito or root beer.
Right now, I gotta confess I would punch someone in the face for a grape…I’m not proud of that!
This has been one of the most painful weeks of my life, as I was talking to a friend today I started crying.
I didn’t cry because of pain, I cried because I was talking about the Holy Spirit and I felt his presence.
I think He is about to do something unexplainable, I believe with all my decreasing guts that something big is happening in the heavens.
The lyrics of an old Newsboys song have become my prayer today…
“Lord, I don’t know where all this is going
Or how it all works out
Lead me to peace that is past understanding
A peace beyond all doubt”

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