The Weakness.

Posted: October 29, 2018 in Postcards from Cancerland.


Growing up I read countless comic books.
Many of them had the same enticing ads in the back, there were advertisements for X-ray vision glasses, and real live Sea Monkeys!
Then there was ALWAYS a full page ad for Charles Atlas (legendary bodybuilder and really strong guy). It was a simple story of a “weakling” finding new strength because of the patented Charles Atlas program.
Something that has surprised me a bit about this wild adventure in Cancerland is how weak I have felt.
I have never felt this weak in my life, and I’ve had my weak moments!
I have hauled hay, enthusiastically walked a 5K, worked the nightshift at Wal-Mart, and been in charge of countless lock-ins.
None of that compares to chemo.
There have been times when I don’t know if I could punch my way through pudding.
But…wait…here’s the truly crazy thing…
In my weakened state I find that I’ve never been stronger!
(I was going to type that last sentence in all caps, but that seemed too physically taxing.)
It’s true, as I have surrendered to the process, I’ve discovered new strength.
Maybe weakness is the secret to true strength. It seems like I might have read that somewhere.
Maybe surrender is the bravest thing we can do.
In my weakness I have leaned into the arms of an old friend.
I have been following Jesus since I was seven years old, but, I feel closer to Him than ever. I have clung to him like Velcro and I have gotten to know Him like never before.
I have realized that His joy really, really is my strength.
All of my life, The joy of the Lord has been the flag that I’ve waved.
We all find our own flag to wave.
But, there comes a time when you have to turn your flag into a stretcher, something that can carry you when you are weak.
You better pick something strong enough to support you during the weak times.
I choose joy.
During my weak times, I have experienced a fullness of joy that is ONLY found in His presence.
So, that is where I choose to hang out.
In my weakened state I find that I’ve never been stronger!
This past weekend Diana and I got to spend some time with my granddaughter, the amazing Moonpie McLovenugget, we sung “baby shark” eight hundred and seventy three times and we had a pretty crazy dance party.
I danced like a toddler hopped up on pixie stix, I was wild and uncoordinated.
I didn’t get tired at all. I didn’t get winded or worn out.
I think it’s because I lost myself in an act of pure joy.
In my weakened state I found that I’ve never been stronger!
This weakling has found new strength, because of my friend, Jesus.

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